Thursday, April 10, 2008

bakit ngayon pa.

There was a time wen I wanted a Yaya for Mikel. It was because nakakabaliw naman to be with Mikel lang 24/7 and not talk to anyone else except si Manny pag nagpupunta siya and people here at home. I thought na ok rin so I could find a job para naman makameet ako ng mga tao, and hindi ako mabobo lang dito. But these past few days I actually enjoyed being a Mom to Mikel. As in hindi ko na inisip na mag -yaya, actually ayoko na. Ako na lang. Kaya ko naman kasi and mas better na ako mag-alaga talaga kay Mikel. But things happen here at home nahirapan na sila mama financially so they keep on insisting that I get work. Parang ayoko kasi I've grown to love being a Stay-at-Home mom (which I never thought I would like before). Nakahanap si Mama ng Yaya for us ni Mikel (later ng 4pm ang interview). I don't know what to feel. Naiiyak ako thinking na I wouldn't be with Mikel lagi na, naiiyak ako na baka di na kami maging ganun kaclose ni Mikel. But I know I have to do this. I Hate this feeling. Bat pa kami now na kung kelan mas gusto ko na dito na lang ako kay Mikel. Sana the Yaya came A month ago siguro when I was depressed and I needed support with Mikel baka mas madali sana. Dati tamad na tamad ako i-practice si Mikel to walk, etc. now I would happily give up what I'm doing just so Mikel would be happy and practicing.

Sorry for the Rant, Really needed to get this off my chest.

5 comments:

psychosomaticaddictinsanesaid...

awwww. ikaw nagkaka-separation anxiety!

may yaya na?

na-panel interview na sya? hehe.

Mommy Carasaid...

Haha onga.. yep may yaya na. although di pa rin dumadating, iniwan lang gamit niya dito at may pinuntahan (which sa village lang din naman) so since hapon na, bukas na start ng sweldo niya.

si mama kumausap eh. tas try namin siya for a week. mukhang nice naman and always smiling

shimumsysaid...

i know how you feel, i was like that too the first time i have to leave my baby to the babysitter. it has been 4 years, sya pa rin sitter ko and i just love her. she loves my daughter so much kaya panatag na rin loob ko.

Mommy Carasaid...

Thanks for the encouraging words shimumsy! Mahirap kasi magtrust sa iba lalo na if about sa baby mo. Good thing there are a lot of cases which ok naman. nakakatakot na kasi ngayon.

Anyway, The yaya's here na. Di ko pa siya pinahandle kay baby today coz pinalinis muna yung tulugan nila. Then tomorrow we're going to Laguna, with the Yaya. At least may help ako

Noreen/www.babylove.nusaid...

Awwww as long as mabuting tao ang mahanap mong yaya para di ka nagwo-worry sa safety ng anak mo!

Ako ay stay-at-home mom din pero I have 3 kids at di naman uso yaya dito...pag ni-daycare ko sila ay baka ma-bankrupt kami sa mahal hahahaha

I do know how you feels sis, about leaving ur baby boy with other people....